Increase your happiness in 4 easy steps!

It’s so easy to become lost in the midst of the chaos of our own thought-scapes. As my dear girlfriend said, “It is really easy to identify with a thought. Why? Because you are calling it with your vibration, so it looks like it is you.”

It’s when we stop believing every thought that appears in our minds that we realise that we are not our thoughts, but the observer of thoughts which surface as the result of our vibrational frequency. Our frequency attracts our thoughts and our thoughts are offered up by our brain for us to choose as companions in our days and often entire lives.

Many of us get caught up in tedious or detrimental thought patterns which lead us from one painful thought to the next, down down down… Until we are crying and we don’t know why… Until we feel more and more defeated each day. And the reason this happens is because we, as the divine leader of our experience, have allowed these thoughts to remain within our consciousness. We have given them the red carpet treatment – champagne, paparazzi, limo, fancy dress… The whole shabang! Why would we give that to the destructive thoughts and not the constructive ones?

You know when you’re playing a video game and you have your character (you) and then you select various companions to accompany you for your mission? You select them based on what skills they possess, in other words, you select them based on what benefits there are when it comes to having them accompanying you in your coming experience(s)…

This is the same with thoughts. Because the thoughts are not who we are – as in meditation we can exist without thought for a time but thought cannot exist without us to think the thought – we are free to observe and select our thoughts based on what we want to achieve. If we want to achieve misery and disaster then we can choose thoughts which will bring us closer to that experience through continued focus. If we want to feel good and to live the life we want, then it is beneficial to choose the thoughts which best allow that sort of an experience.

Why? Because if we want chocolate ice cream and all we are thinking of is mint ice cream, we will miss the chocolate ice cream, even when it’s directly in front of us.


So how does this work in practice?

Step #1: Meditate. Meditation is a great tool for so many reasons but here it serves to show you the space between your true self and your thoughts. For example, my true self is someone who is brave, determined and resourceful… But my thoughts would have me believe that I am a relentless failure who is foolish to continue onwards. Notice the difference in energy? Your true self will never make you feel shit about anything. Your thoughts will, time and time again.

Step #2: Pay attention to your thoughts. Without reacting to any thoughts that arise as you sit in your quiet space after meditating, notice which thoughts are appearing as a result of fear and which are the thoughts coming from your true self. Notice how each thought makes you feel.

Step #3: Remember that every thought is there for a reason. While it is always your choice to discern which thoughts are constructive and which thoughts are destructive, you are calling each and every thought into your experience with your vibration, and each ripple of your vibration is determined by a different factor. Large determining factors for your vibrational state are your subconscious patterns. And so, while choosing your thoughts at any given moment is kind and compassionate towards yourself, also it is compassionate to note the most commonly occurring thoughts and feelings and work with them later on in a time period dedicated to the awareness of what these patterns really mean, why they are really there and what it will take to shift them. This should never be done alone as doing this sort of work alone is like self-torture and it can be very easy to lie to yourself as well. As such, I recommend working with someone experienced in this sort of work. Be it a friend or a coach like me, enlist some help to see long-lasting positive results.

Step #4: Select thoughts which propel you rather than paralyse you. If you are aware that reality is a subjective experience then it will make sense to you that selecting thoughts which feel good for you will naturally lead you to a more pleasant experience inside your mind. Likewise, selecting thoughts which don’t feel good, will limit and restrict your happiness overall.

Remember: If you don’t believe the thoughts you are thinking then they hold no power. If you don’t believe a negative thought, it has no hold over you. But also, if you don’t believe a positive thought then it will do you no good. So, always choose thoughts that you can believe!

Applying what I have shared here will lead you to a greater more harmonious experience of life and so it will naturally increase your level of happiness. Practice it daily for the best results and remember that while this process will increase happiness day-to-day, in order to see long-lasting results you must balance the awareness of your thoughts with inner-work to dispel negative thought patterns.

“Watch your thoughts; they become your words. Watch your words; they become your actions. Watch your actions; they become your habits. Watch your habits; they become your character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.” – Lao Tzu

Has this helped you? Leave me a comment and tell me how! Want to work with me? You can get in contact by leaving a comment, using the form on the contact page OR by heading straight on over to the Coaching page and selecting a set package which works for you.

I trust this has served you well!

Onwards and upwards!


Live, love and play!