So, I’ve been absent for a while now. It’s nothing person to you, really. I’ve just been riding the wave that is my life the past few weeks/months, without really giving a thought to how I’m going to translate it into words or how I’m going to share it – or even begin to. Over the past few weeks, or however long it’s been, my life has taken a few quite odd and largely curious twists and turns that I wouldn’t have expected.
The first is that I’ve been spending a lot more time alone. Due to recent complications regarding our commitments and obligations, Rosa has had to be out of the house a lot more than usual. This has meant that I’ve had a lot more time for myself, for introspection, for Darshan Road and for my hobbies. Weirdly enough, most things have lost their appeal for me recently. All I want to do is listen to music, make music, mod Skyrim and talk to Rosa. All of which are things I’ve been able to enjoy a fair amount of recently, with the exception of one – which the lack of has made way for more of the other bits.
Since we last spoke, the garden has come to life much more so. The colour green is now a resident of our little oasis. Mr. Tam is still around and rarely strays far from home these days. He’s become quite territorial over the house and Rosa and I. He doesn’t tend to let the other cats and dogs disrespect us or the home we all share now. When one particularly boisterous cat tries to steal his food (and this happens often) Tam sees the cheeky little bugger off with a few swift wallops to the head. Nothing too hard though, just enough to get the point across. “This is my food, you little shit. Sort your life out.”
If you’re into astrology at all – which I don’t claim to be – chances are you’re well aware of the Mercury Retrograde that’s currently on-going.This far it’s been quite a gentle one, as far as Mercury Retrogrades go. Myself and pretty much everyone around me has been brought to re-evaluate certain things from their past. For me, it’s been a sort of “You left this behind when you left that other thing before, are you sure you don’t want this?” sort of a Mercury Retrograde. When I left a relationship which wasn’t working, years back, I moved out of the flat I was living in with my then-partner. When I moved out of the flat, I sort of drifted around England for like 4 months before ending up back at my Mum’s house. One thing I was sort of forced by circumstance to leave behind – or I sort of just, left behind because I forgot about it (that we’ll never know) – was the electronic music production part of my life.
For years and years, I’ve been a musician. Fascinated and mystified by music, I picked up the guitar when I was 11 and have played regularly since. I’ve always been writing songs but about 5-6 years ago, I started making electronic music… electronica/psytrance/psybient sort of music to be more specific – although not that much more specific. It all began when I was living at my Mum’s still, totally addicted to smoking weed and at college, studying music business and performance – an experience which landed me with plenty of experience, plenty of memories (both good and bad) and a BTEC Diploma in Music.
I started making weird drug-fueled psychedelic music with a band I was in at the time – a psychedelic rock band called Gravity Junkie. A band of which I’m immensely proud of to this day. If things hadn’t gone sour – and if I was still living in England – I’d likely consider trying to get the original members back together again for at least a play through of the old set for old times sake. That same theme carried through into a college band I was in for a while – a band I made some good friends in, as well as rekindled an old friendship as a result of. Through all of that, this electronic music production was where I found myself most passionately creative. When I wasn’t swinging my guitar around and bashing it with my fist to make otherworldly delayed effects resonate around festival big tents in wet and windy fields, that is. Well, that exact scenario only happened once. But you get what I’m pointing to.
When my whole life changed, I let it go. I just… stopped making electronic music. It was the start of another chapter of my life. A chapter wherein I got into another bad relationship, became homeless and then ended up back at my Mums again. A chapter wherein I caged myself totally in ideas of being some grand spiritual figure. All ideas of my own creation, I must add. A chapter which in time showed itself as nothing more than an intense transition stage wherein I met the love of my life, dropped even more than I had dropped before and then came here to Mexico. Then… Well, you know the rest.
Only now, 3-4 years on from uploading my most successful tracks… I’m back at it. And, you know what? I’m fucking glad. I’ve missed it. It’s the best thing in the world. Okay, so I’m a bit rusty with my DAW and just about everything else I need to know. But I’m remembering fast. And I’ve already put out one new track – a track which itself sort of serves as a transitional piece between my older music and my newer stuff. Perhaps. Maybe. maybe not. Either way, I made it and I’m making more. If you want to , you can check it out here: http://soundcloud.com/FractalMandala and follow updates on Facebook here: http://facebook.com/FractalMandalaSounds.
Anyways, it’s time for me to finished my pasta/soup sort of things because it’s approaching room temperature as a daunting rate and I want it warm!
Keep it real, folks.
Live, love and play.